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Blessings / emotional processing

Two of the rowers that I coached in Texas are getting married this month. I won't be able to attend the wedding (fieldwork), but while riding in to work today I contemplated what to write on the RSVP card. My father's simple declaration, "Blessings," comes to mind. This couple brought a lot of blessings to the rowing program in Texas, and they are both the sort of people for whom I wish continued blessings.


It is taking a lot of time for me to just think and process things so I can get back to a point where I can focus and analyze data and write. Yesterday I just sat and didn't really try to do much beyond cricket care and the evening's circadian experiment. I just couldn't. I'm not quite at one of those stages where I _utterly_ loathe myself for frittering away time on the internet, but I do keep circling back to that thought of what kinds of actions have more lasting and fulfilling impact, wanting to reinvest myself in those actions.

With data analysis and writing, I also have to remind myself to be very patient. I want to get more stuff out the door, and soon, but I'm unwilling to send out poor work. There are a lot of decisions to make on things that don't have clear-cut answers. This slows me down, and then I get distracted by how many of my peers spend a lot of time tooting their own academic horns on social media about the stuff they've published. [And let's just note here that it's the male academic peers who seem to do the vast majority of this - the female academic peers tend to engage in different ways] And while I should spend *some* time trying to keep up with the current literature, I should also try to avoid spending too much time on it. I'm far enough out of routine to have lost track of how to manage these things.

There's still more "analysis paralysis" for choosing what to work on because I always have too many balls in the air. Do I work on data analysis for the circadian experiment, or do I roll up my sleeves to get back to work on the cricket lifespan manuscript?

Gearing up for fieldwork is yet another distraction. I have around four lists started, so far. I'm going to forget at least one thing.

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