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Goodbye to my dad

You can probably understand if my family and I are wrecked right now.

A very wise and supportive colleague says, "Work when it is helpful, don't work when work is not helpful."

I had to go out and ride my bike today, so I rode in to work for a while in spite of being a wreck. [personal profile] annikusrex says that it was snowing softly this morning in Seattle.

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There is some relief in knowing his suffering has ended. A hard side effect of all this is insomnia (my own but also I suspect other family members); but then I just finished reading about all of the serious dangers associated with sedatives and sedation. So I am hoping that other loved ones who also experience grief-based insomnia can find other ways to cope. I suspect I will go talk to trees in the Arboretum and in Interlaken Park as soon as I can.

When visiting at Christmas, I borrowed Life is a Miracle from my father and I will start to read it now.

Stories are going to flow out of order and probably incoherently. A big one is that when my cousin Zack disappeared on Mt. Rainier and I was struggling to understand how that was affecting my mind, my father was the person I called to talk to in trying to make sense of things. Hard to have lost a longtime pivotal source of comfort and wisdom in that respect, and yet no one can live forever.

This entry was originally posted at https://rebeccmeister.dreamwidth.org/1284721.html

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